Macc

Listen to this reflection by playing the video below or continue down the page to read the full text version.

The Gawron family faced many life challenges. Foremost among those challenges was growing up in a home with a mother diagnosed with bipolar disorder. The family did an incredible job working through those challenges. I was always amazed at their ability to support each other and keep moving forward with such joy.

One impact of that challenge was Mary, Amy, and Mark’s very conservative approach to finances. They got this from their father, Frank. Two of Frank’s more memorable and oft repeated lines were:

• If you can’t pay cash, you can’t afford it.
• If Farm & Fleet doesn’t have it, you don’t need it.

I got an early indication of this financial conservatism when, the morning after I proposed, Amy insisted we sit down and develop a budget for how we were going to afford a wedding. Two days later, on her return trip to Milwaukee from Minneapolis, the transmission in her car, affectionately referred to as Chet Zesty, failed. It shattered our carefully crafted budget in an instant.

This financial conservatism contributed to Amy’s reticence to take any vacation that involved travel, especially ones just for the two of us. She had a real fear of an unexpected health or financial crisis that could set us back. In her thought process, vacations abroad or involving air travel were an unneeded financial risk.

That is why it was so momentous when Amy finally agreed to go to the Mexican Riviera with our good friends Joe and Jackie. Our destination was the Riu Palace Mexico, an all-inclusive hotel in Playa Del Carmen. We landed in Cancun and took an hour-long shuttle to the hotel.

When we arrived in our room and I connected to the wireless network, my phone blew up with incoming messages. Before I even had a chance to read any of them, Claire called via WhatsApp to inform us that Amy’s mother, Judy, had passed while we were in transit.

Although she had been in poor health for many years, the news was a shock. After several calls with her family, it was decided to delay the memorial three weeks to coincide with the Grandkids college breaks. That way they could all attend without the stress of making up mid-term exams. Everyone assured Amy that Judy would want her to continue with her vacation. Amy did her best to stay in the moment and enjoy our trip, but I know it weighed heavily on her.

The Celebration of Life was a beautiful ceremony with family and friends gathering from all corners of the country. She was reunited with Frank (the always practical) in a niche that he had purchased as an anniversary gift to her one year.

Two months later, life was beginning to settle back down. One night in mid-April, Amy and I were watching a television show when Amy suddenly muted the television. She turned toward me and gave me the big lower pouty lip. I knew something big was coming.

She said softly, “We need a dog, again.” I was dumbfounded. Dakota, our first dog, had passed away in a tragic accident when he was only 18 months and our beloved Scout had passed at only four years old from an unknown disease.

At the time, we had discussed and agreed that our family might not be destined to have a dog. Seven years removed from that discussion, we were now empty nesters and wanted to travel more, I mused that this was little more than a passing whim.

I knew that the pouty lip was not to be trifled with, however. So, I decided to call her bluff and reach out to all of the English Springer Spaniel (a Youngquist tradition) breeders within a 150 mile radius to see if any of them were expecting any litters in the coming months. Unfortunately, all were reserved. When I informed Amy of this, she told me that perhaps we could break the tradition and get another breed.

As I was mulling this option over, I received a call from one of the breeders. One of the families that had put earnest money down on one of her newborn puppies had backed out. She had a black and white male springer available immediately. If we wanted him, she was hoping we could pick him up the following weekend.

When I shared this news with Amy, I expected some hesitation given the reality of having a new puppy in the house. Instead she said “We have to go shopping tonight. We gave all of Scout’s stuff away.”

Later she asked me if I had thought about possible names for the puppy. I told her “I was thinking we would take the first letter of each of the kids names and yours, Morgan, Amy, Carson, Claire, and name him Macc.” She immediately fell in love with the name.

The following Saturday, we drove to Naperville to pick up Macc. When we arrived, our first impression was that the breeder was struggling with health issues. It made it difficult for her to care for so many dogs. The kennel was located in her basement, and she struggled to go up and down the stairs. Macc was adorable, but he also was pretty rank. Although well fed, he probably had not been bathed in quite a while. Macc, wrapped in a blue baby blanket, sat in Amy’s lap all the way back to Milwaukee. As we neared home, Amy looked at me and said, “We saved him.”

When we got home, we first reached out to Morgan and Carson via Facetime to tell them the news before Carson had to be at baseball practice. When we introduced them to their new brother, we witnessed an unexpected display of raw emotion from both boys. They broke down into tears and took several minutes to compose themselves as they digested the news of their new family member.

That accomplished, we decided to wait to call Claire until after Macc received a much-needed bath. Unfortunately, within minutes we received a call from Claire. Carson had posted something on Twitter. She was very excited to meet Macc when she returned home from Physical Therapy school.

Macc adjusted well to life at the Youngquist household despite the kids coming and going from college and then jobs over the next few years. Whenever any of the kids visit, Macc goes crazy with excitement. Even the sight of a car remotely similar to Claire, Morgan or Carson’s will send him into a howling frenzy.

Macc was able to visit Amy when she entered hospice care. When he came through the door there were many people in the room with a lot of activity. Macc ignored everyone and everything and went directly to Amy’s bedside and tried to crawl up onto the bed. We gave him a little lift and he curled up between Amy’s legs and rested his head on one of her legs. He remained there for quite some time seeming to understand the enormity of the situation.

Macc has been my constant companion the past few months as we hike mile after mile together. Macc is Amy’s enduring gift to me and the kids. We haven’t saved him. Macc has saved us.