A New Star

Anyone who is lucky enough to be present when their children are born knows the wonder and magnificence of that moment. I was blessed to be present for the birth of all three of our children, and they were unforgettable. Words can never convey the emotions and love present as your child enters the world.

With our first child, we had no idea what to expect. The trend back in 1994 was to give birth without the assistance of pain medication. During our Lamaze classes, the instructor practically shamed couples who indicated they weren’t going to have a natural childbirth experience. Given it was our first child, we—meaning Amy—decided to forgo the pain medications if possible.

At the forty-week appointment, the doctor saw no evidence that Amy was in labor, even though the baby had dropped a couple of weeks prior. We returned home disappointed.

The next day, Amy called me at work to let me know she was feeling something. I headed home just in case. When I arrived, there was still no movement and those feelings had dissipated.

Amy had heard that walking sometimes could hasten childbirth, so the rest of the afternoon and evening we could be seen walking slowly through our neighborhood. By 9:00 p.m., we were both exhausted and decided to try and get some sleep in case those feelings returned in the middle of the night.

At some point in the night, Amy woke me as she was feeling contractions. We timed them, but they were roughly seven to eight minutes apart. Being first-time parents, we decided that was good enough, and we called the doctor on duty about 4:00 a.m. They told us very gently that was great, but not to head to the hospital until the contractions were about four to five minutes apart or they lasted more than a minute.

By 6:30 a.m., we were both anxious to get the show rolling, so we headed to the hospital. Once we arrived and settled into our room, the contractions continued to be spaced out. Amy was increasingly uncomfortable as the morning dragged on and the contractions increased in intensity. The nurse suggested Amy try to relax by resting in a hot tub.

While she was in the hot tub, she closed her eyes and was very peaceful. I made a note to thank the nurse for her suggestion as it seemed to be working very well. After ten minutes, Amy suddenly opened her eyes, looked confused, and then asked me how long she had been passed out.

She never really forgave me for my assumption that she was meditating and gave me grief about it every time we recalled the incident.

At that point, she decided that she wanted an epidural for the pain. Unfortunately, her medical team said that it was too late in the process, and she would need to proceed without anything to manage the pain. She squeezed my hand so hard during the contractions that she bent my wedding ring.

The contractions continued to grow in intensity and began to accelerate quickly. It was then that the baby’s vitals began to show signs of distress. The medical team started moving with haste to prepare for an emergency C-section.

Her medical team moved Amy to various positions in hopes of relieving the stress on our little one. They were able to find a very awkward position that seemed to help. Amy was focused and told the staff she could maintain the very uncomfortable pose as long as needed. She was able to maintain her position for about fifteen minutes before the contractions reached a point where her team said it was time for Amy to deliver the baby.

The rest of the delivery was a blur; however, I remembered the most important task of any husband present at their child’s birth: Do as you’re told and don’t get in the way.

Claire Louise arrived at 1:56 p.m. on a beautiful October afternoon. She weighed six pounds, seven ounces. A new star was born.

A few days later, I lay on the couch with Claire Bear asleep on my chest. I watched as her breath went in and out and realized in that moment that I had never been closer to heaven.